Family Dinners-The Loss of a Family Tradition

The days of the family gathering around the table in the early evening to share a meal have been replaced with busy schedules and easy to grab food. In a society where it is common for both parents to be working outside the home and the children are involved in several after school activities, fast food is fast becoming the popular choice for dinner. The one time of the day where the family could count on spending some time together is quickly fading as more and more options are available in the fast food industry. This convenience of fast food restaurants have made them a preference for our fast pace society and has had a negative impact on the traditional sit down family meal at home.

There once was a time when families used dinner as an opportunity to discuss the day’s events of each individual at the table. The evening would begin with mom in the kitchen cooking the families traditional meals with recipes passed down from generations or recipes she has collected over time. When dinner was ready the entire family would gather around the dinner table to eat. Throughout dinner family members would share the events of their day. Such conversations range from “how was your day at school or work?’ to discussion of current events. Dinner was a time that families could rely on being together.

In today’s hectic lifestyle the possibility of an entire family being together for dinner on a regular basis has diminished. The rise of fast food restaurants has enabled families to maintain a constant “on-the-go” lifestyle. Fast food is a simple substitution for nightly sit down dinners at home. Unfortunately, this type of lifestyle has made it difficult for families to communicate on a personal level. Conversations about school and currents events are more difficult inside the car at the drive through or inside a noisy restaurant. Inside the restaurant, children are focused on the toy they have received in their dinner or the humongous play area. Parents are consumed with trying to get everyone’s order correct, finding a place to sit and keeping the entire family in their seats. If the dinner is obtained in the drive through, it is most likely it will be eaten in the car where conversation is less likely.

Family communication is not the only thing a family loses when they choose fast food over a home cooked meal. Helping and observing mom in the kitchen has given families time to share and pass down recipes from generation to generation, while teaching the techniques of cooking those recipes along the way. As more and more families choose fast food dinners over sit down dinners at home, the recipes and techniques start to get lost. Where will those memories of your “favorite meal that mom cooks” be if most of the dinners you have are fast food? How will you remember to make that chicken potpie like mom if mom only makes it once a year? Often, family’s traditional recipes are a healthy balance of vegetables, meats and whole grains. In contrast, fast food usually consists of additives, preservatives and high saturated fats with little or no vegetable choices. Continually eating fast food can cause an addiction to that particular style of food making it more desirable than healthy home cooked food that is served during a family dinner. The result could be that families not only choose to eat fast food when they are short on time, but start eating it because they prefer it.

In addition to losing exposure to traditional family recipes and cooking techniques, a person’s over all health is affected by consuming too much fast food. Over the past twenty years obesity rates have risen significantly, which seems to coincide with the decrease in traditional family sit down meals and the increase in availability of fast food. No longer will you hear, “you need to eat your peas before you leave the table”. Kids miss out on education of healthy eating that they get from mom and dad when the family sit down dinner is replaced by fast food. It’s hard to teach a child the importance of eating their fruits and vegetables when the fruits and vegetables are absent in the meal. How are children taught about portion size when the portions are already decided for them? “Only take as much as you can eat” is a common statement at the dinner table, teaching children about not wasting food. If a person is eating a meal where the portions are already decided, they have one of two choices, eat all of it or throw away the rest. Although fast food enables society to fall out of the tradition of sitting down at home and eating their meal, it does give the family the flexibility to be involved in many things outside the home. Richard Pillsbury says, “The good part is that mom does not have to spend the day or days preparing the food and can enjoy the event with the same relaxed ease as other” (190) in Thoroughly Modern Dining. This is true; mom is able to focus on other things besides cooking, for example, working and having a career of her own. This also gives the kids more time to be involved in different hobbies and interests. It is not necessary for them to feel confined to the dining room and the need to be there for every meal. Pillsbury also says, “The downside is that mom no longer plays the role of the dispenser of personalized love and attention” (190). Family sit down meals have much more meaning behind them than a grab and go dinner from McDonalds.

People’s lives will continue to be busy and the traditional sit down dinners will possibly fade away. Future kids may have to watch reruns of Happy Days or Leave it to Beaver to understand what a traditional family dinner looks like. Families will have to create new ways to find time to communicate, bond and pass down family traditions in the kitchen.